Thursday, February 21, 2008

Bobsledding, Snaggletooth, and The Party Snake

Despite not sleeping well all week, I feel amazingly energized and ready to rock n roll today. Lots of random thoughts and observations running through my head:

I keep findings little pieces of Christmas around my house. Just when I think I've gotten it all cleaned up, I notice something else. I can't believe I just noticed that I forgot to take my decoration off the chandelier. And speaking of Christmas, my neighbor just threw their Christmas tree away the day after Valentine's Day .... it had been lit every night up until then. Veird, huh?

Today is the anniversary of the release of Whitney Houston's first album. I'll be belting out "Saving All my Love for Youuuuuu" on the way to work this morning, in her honor.

I'm not sure which of these is my earliest memory, but both of them were when I was 2 years old: one was sitting on my great grandfather's lap at his house on Maryland's Eastern shore. He was 101, and that's the only memory I have of him. I also remember our family bringing my sister home from the hospital when she was born. I sat between my grandfather and my mother in the backseat, and my sister was partially on my lap resting on a red courdoroy pillow.

The car mentioned above was a late 60s model Chevy Impala, light brown, and very very longgggg. It looked like a dachsund on wheels ... or a party snake turd.

I once broke my middle finger pretending I was a Jamaican bobsledder. A friend of mine and I slid down some basement steps crouched down on our imaginary bobsled. I was in the back, and when the "bobsled" suddenly crashed into the wall at the bottom of the stairs, my finger became a casualty. It was immediately splinted with a popsicle stick that was about 3 inches longer than my finger and some bandaids. I think somebody fixed me another drink after that.

Speaking of bandaids, years ago some friends and I traveled to Egypt to visit my parents while they were living there. In the middle of our Nile cruise, my sister's front tooth broke in half. Very traumatic in any setting, but much worse when floating in the middle of a place with very little if any dental care. We called our "Julie McCoy" (an Egyptian woman named "Moni) to tell her what happened and ask for help. She immediately came to our cabin, bearing a giant bag of cotton balls and a bunch of bandaids. All of us kinda looked at her, curious about how she was going to use those for a broken tooth. Talk about lost in translation?! She thought we said my sister's toe fell off!!! ....and she was going to reattach her toe with bandaids and cotton balls!!!! Luckily, that night on the boat was "Dress Up as an Egyptian Bellydancer with a Veil" night, so my sister had a big veil across her face, and no one had a clue that a snaggletooth was hiding underneath.

On that note, I'm off to the races!!! If you've got a funny story, don't keep it to yourself .... share the wealth!!!!

10 comments:

SGM said...

LOL.
I had totally forgotten about MOni and the bandaids! I still have this fuzzy image of the dentist's office in Cairo ... it makes me uneasy.

You may not know this, but I was the proud owner of a '77 Chevy Impala 4 door that my father bought me for $500. At one time it had been a regal red; it was more of a sick pink when I got it. That car could haul some a$$! Her name was Bessie. After I drove it for years, my brother drove it for a while and then I think he (or someone he knew) used it in a ... what the heck do you call those car crash derby things? One of them.

BTW - do you want pix of shoes with or without feet BAAAHHAAAHAAHAHAHAHH

Sandi said...

I can't seem to get rid of Christmas in my house either. That's because the kid keep finding the Christmas books and DVDs I put away and want to still look at them. Yesterday we watched "A Wiggly Christms" and read "Frosty the Snowman".

Shelley Jaffe said...

Oooh, Countess Babs - off to the Derby! Please imbibe at least 3 mint juleps for me, and tell us all about your fabulous hat once you get back!

Funny about the "Lost in Translation" tooth story. My husband's wildly allergic to crab, so one night when we went out for sushi, he told the waitress this, to ensure that he didn't accidently get given any (this place actually used the real stuff, and not the usually pink-colored pollock). She nodded that she understood, and came back about 2 minutes later to ask "What about King Crab? Can you eat that?". We all got a fairly good chuckle out of that, and throughout the evening each of us in turn pretended we were the server, and popped our head inside the room to ask him about other varieties. Oh, wacky sushi humor - nothing quite like it!

Amber said...

I am sorry about the missing tooth. How traumatic. However, the bandages and cotton balls were funny. I'm all out of funny stories right now...I'm feeling funky.

Los said...

I remember my parents owning some sort of green Volkswagon station wagon, and then selling it to my uncle. He had it for another 5-6 years.

The first dog we had was named Prince. He was really smart and well trained. When I got on his nerves, he would turn his back to me, and kick me like a horse. Ah, good times.

who said...

God I enjoy your blog! I remember having a party at my parents house when they were out of town and my dad making me go to each of the neighbors houses and apologizing to them. They were actually all cool about (even the barfing in their yards)

Lisa said...

Gee, the shoes should be sans toes ... of course!!

Sandi, that reminds me I need to clear my DVR of all the Christmas crap I taped.

Baronness, sushi humor? Sounds fishy to me!! (BTW, I'm a sushi lover too!)

Scarlett, I hope your funk is over soon. I know they suck. It's too bad funks can't be fixed with cotton balls and bandaids. Buck up little camper!!

Los --I never you had a dog (or a horse, as the case may be). I bet the stationwagon was a gem!

Rara- Ew, yard puke is nasty! I once threw up on a bush and there were noodles hanging from it the next day, like the grossest noodle tinsel you've ever seen. So gross!!!

Dorka said...

Missing a front tooth is no laughing matter. Remember my bread tooth? How could you forget, right?

PS this is my first post to a blog. I'm a blog virgin. Or rather, was.

SGM said...

A... Lisa?
You once puke on a bush?
Ah ... what about the time you fell on the roof of an old couple's car and puked on their winshield - right in front of their horrified faces?

SGM said...

The idea that Lil Fuzz is any kind of virgin just cracks me the heck up!